12 June 1982,
I was In his arms, happy as I ever had been. I looked Him in the eye and I knew he is all that I need to complete my presence on this World.The journey that I had been waiting for a while was about to commence and I was very sure that It will be worth my lifetime. I was with the man whom I had loved with all my heart and would surely continue to do so till the end of my breath..
12th June 2010,
The sun has started to rise as I made my way Into the Kitchen, I had to make lunch boxes for my kids before they get ready for their office. I wasn’t myself today. Memories from the past kept coming back, some which made me smile and some which my tears couldn’t fight. But I dint wanted the kids to know anything about it, so I just went with my morning chores until they left.
I started getting ready for my own day once they left but somewhere Inside I knew that never wanted this day to be the same as every other, Something In me kept saying I had to go down memory lane. I just had to live In the past, At-least once more. Yet, I started for work knowing I never was going to make it to my office. Random memories kept coming back to me as I made way to the train station and boarded my usual train. Thankfully, I got some space In a crowed train and the nearby window was a delight to have without a fight. Something sure was good about this day I thought as I looked out of the window.
And then I saw him, Standing at the platform smiling at me. I remembered that smile of his, I loved nothing more than that smile. And the same window opened a chapter long turned over In my life. He still stood there and Smiled like a child, I wanted to run towards him and hug him as I had done that day three decades ago. But I knew, I can only chase memories, cant hold onto them. So, I continued to turn the pages of life and went back on the same day In the year 1982. I was barely 16 and against the wishes of my family and this world, I had got married to the man I love.
We both hailed from different backgrounds, castes and cultures but love had brought us together and we had decided to stay together till death do us apart. We got married In a small temple In the presence of His family, which was no more than his mother alone, who was half his world as me. I was blessed not only to have him in my life but also to have a Mother-in-law who loved me as her daughter and teach me all that I can ever need In life. I remembered the first time I had come home, to our home, It was unfamiliar yet his mere presence In it was comforting. In my early days of Marriage, I came to know a whole different side of love, the kind only he was capable of showing. He just wasn’t my soul-mate, he was a friend, a Guide and all of what I had. Those were the days that keep me wanting to live for his dreams and of mines.
I opened my eye and got off the train and decide to make way to travel a little further to a place he always used to take me when I was upset and we used to sit there for hours with my hand in his and the world was complete. It was a small park with kids playing around all the time with a jogging park as its perimeter. Things had changed in the place since I was there the first time with him.
I went and sat on the exact same bench where I used to sit with him watching the little children play and then that scene took me back to the memories of the birth of my own children. He was so elated on being a father. Full of joy and it was evident In his eyes and smile to whoever didn’t notice him trying to scream from the rooftops every now and then.I remember him walking in the room after our son was born, he looked at our son and then smiled at me and letting me know that he loved me so much and would do so forever. And that memory still leaves my eyes moist.
He was everything A woman ever needed in her life and I was the luckiest woman to have him in my life. Yet, things never went they way there were supposed to and I was there sitting alone, only walking back in time to relieve his memories. The pieces of my heart were crumbing thinking of what could have been and what the reality is.
I made my way out of that place and decided to head back home so that I can have some more time to myself. I stopped at a local bakery to buy his favorite cake and then continued on my way.
I reached home by mid afternoon and after having a little time for me to relax, I decided to cut the small cake that I had brought. I cut a small piece of that cake and kept it near his lone photograph in my room..
It was our 30th Marriage anniversary!
But, unfortunately I was the only one celebrating it. He had passed away 17years ago courtesy a cardiac arrest and I had to walk the rest of my journey of life all by myself. With only his memories as a souvenir for the true love that I once had.
That’s when suddenly the door bell rang. I wasn’t expecting anyone till another couple of hours and yet someone was here. Curiously, I opened the door only to find my kids standing outside with bright smiles on their faces. I noticed that they had brought flowers and cake as if they were going to have a huge celebration. My younger son hugged me as soon as he was in the house and with a peck on my cheeks wished me Happy Anniversary. Tears started to flow out of my eyes and this time there was no controlling them. Both of my children hugged me and I knew even if he was not around, his love was always alive in the form of my children.
My world still was full of love, in a different form though. In a kind which makes you want to live all over again…
True love is not a myth. But saying that only a few of us are really blessed to have it in their lives. Sometimes Its good enough to die for while at some other times, It makes you want to live all over again. Some love stories never dies, they just live on amongst us, unsaid and unnoticed.
But a timely sequel always follows in another time In another world.
Love sure was worth it but then how do people know that they have fallen for the right person? How do they know its true as the sun and the moon..?
Some questions always linger in my mind knowing the answers are going to be a lot different from person to person. I had to find mines though.
Its just the start of my long journey…